Your tribe is louder than your motivation.

When I first timidly stepped into a CrossFit gym in 2010, the female coaches and athletes were shocked to discover I could perform ring muscle-ups and handstand push-ups. They assumed these advanced exercises were only achievable by men or elite female athletes.

They took up the challenge, and within days or weeks many of them were performing those skills as well. Not long after that, they were doing them better and faster than me.

In turn, I was inspired to level up, and the end result of this upward spiral was a number of us qualifying for the Western Canadian Finals of the CrossFit Games.

My husband once asked me, “If someone could only change one thing for their health and fitness, what would make the biggest impact?”

To my surprise, after a moment of thought, I said, friends.

It wasn’t something I had ever said before, but it landed because I’d already lived it.

The people around me pull and push me higher, especially when I don’t feel like it. Often, I’m not even conscious of it. They show me of what I’m capable of, help me reach the goals I’ve set, and sometimes uncover new ones I didn’t even know I wanted. They’re an invisible current that keeps me going even when motivation fades.

Family, coworkers, teammates, and neighbors all shape our definition of normal. 

Our attitudes, emotions, and habits aren’t formed in isolation; they subtly but powerfully spread among the people we share our time and space with. Whether we notice it or not, those people are either quietly pulling us down or helping us rise.

Researchers call this social contagion, the way behaviours and emotions spread through groups. Health habits, motivation, even confidence can catch on like laughter rippling through a crowd. Research from Harvard and UC San Diego found that if a close friend becomes obese, your likelihood of becoming obese increases by 57 percent.

The opposite is also true. When the people around you prioritize health, it spreads. Their consistency quietly rewires your sense of what’s normal.

That’s the real power of a circle of influence.

You don’t copy your friends on purpose, you calibrate to them. 

If your circle normalizes a sedentary lifestyle and mocks the disciplined, it quietly lowers your bar. If your circle values strength, fresh air, and self-respect, it powerfully raises it.

You might not change your family, and you shouldn’t burn bridges trying. Meet them where they are. Invite them in if they’re willing, but keep your compass steady even if they’re not.

Recognize their influence, then intentionally build a new tribe of friends who live out the values you admire. It doesn’t mean relying on them to carry you, it means joining the current.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17

Because health isn’t something you do alone. It’s something we build together.

Homework: Take inventory of your circle this week. Who calls you higher? Who helps you grow? Make one intentional move, a walk, a workout, a conversation, with someone who sharpens you. If you don’t have someone like that, where would they be? Go there, and make friends by being a friend.

Then ask yourself, Who might need that same encouragement from me?

Find your tribe and keep lifting each other.

If you’re in the Edmonton area and want a coach in your corner, you can you can reach out to work with me ​here​.

With you in it,
Amanda